guidelines to living with robots linda's edition
by JayNinjaOfLightning15
Summary: i decided to make my own guidelines. it will get funnier with some ideas, for you critics out there! rated T for cybertronian and human swearing! if you're good with reveiws i might do a different story on each chapter!
1. AN:need help as you can see!

I have decided to write my own guidelines!

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Tally-ho! I used **ONE** guideline from Tatyana's guidelines. I got permission!

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Rule1: never buy a 15lb bag of jelly beans and proceed to eat it all in one night. * Tai ,Sam and me nearly blew up the whole base*

* when we woke up the base was a mix of different colors, mostly neon* 

* boss-bot was angry with me! I only ate it and passed out! Or did I?*

Rule2: never tell wheelie to strip down to his protoform and proceed to chain him to Mikaela's bed. * she screamed and went after Sam.* *I was laughing so hard I thought I could pee on myself!*

Rule3: never do something bad and try to hide behind your guardian.* I still cant believe that Ratchet let me get in trouble! What kind of guardian is that?! Curse you bee and Sam! I will get my revenge….maybe.*

Rule4: never talk Ratchet into going in a race with Bumblebee, and Barricade. * Primus, we lost. I almost killed Sam and Tai. They lived because Ratchet caught me in time. Stupid medic not wanting injuries… to bad I can get into BOTH their roomsJ*

Rule5: never play hide and go seek with your guardians.* Sam and tai made them promise to turn off their scanners. I let Ratchet keep 'em on because I wanted to scare them. It worked. Sam peed himself.*

Rule6: it is true- you should never , EVER ,** EVER**, stand next to Jolt in a lightning storm. * I fainted. HARD.*

Rule7: run if you put high-grade in Skids and Mudflap's energon. * the outcome is not very pretty when Skids and Mudflap are getting chased by a very ticked off 'bee.* * especially when you're the one laughing your aft off.* * human sushi is not good.*

Rule8: tai is completely forbidden to very sugary drinks. * I help her on occasion to get by her high.* *to bad she ratted herself out.* * she was strapped to the med-bay berth for 24 hours.* *sugar rush on a cyborg girl takes to long.*

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That is all I could come up with!!

Review please!

Also some ideas if you please!


	2. yay! more random!

_Rule9: never run around the base screaming 'the Decepticons are coming, the Decepticons are coming!' * ironhide literally came running out shooting blindly. Ratchet had his hands full. Oww…* _

_Rule10: ratchet is one bot you don't wanna piss off. * especially if he's gotta fix you up. My arm is bruised in several places plus a broken wrist that he had to fix after my arm. I only had a broken arm!*_

_Rule11: never under any circumstances do you spike the bots energon. * even though tai had a bunch of Blurrs all over the place. I thought she would burst with happiness. Until one bot after another started to collapse in recharge. We spent the night at Sam's house. We went home to pissed off and groggy bots.*_

_Rule12: never tell the bots " I killed Paul!" * They will interrogate you. __**HARD.**__ I cried so hard they believed it was a joke. I hid behind ratchet for 2 weeks. I wouldn't let go. I was treated like a sparkling. YAY!_

_Rule13: never wear a sombrero in a funky fashion and wave a flashlight around screaming like a banshee like squidward from __**SPONGEBOB.**_ *I had several bots going at it with the humans. We had fun until the Major and Minor twins decided to wrestle. I cheered on Mudflap.*

Rule14: when on a nice quiet picnic with the bots at the lookout never abrubtiply stop talking when you see something and say "oooo…a butterfly. Huh? Wha? Oh did you know butterflies have hypnosis powers?" *everybody took the frag off leaving their charges. The smart more logical ones ignored it. So smart aren't they?*

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that's all I got. Please reviews are hugs!!!

And ransom!!

Any ideas PM me!


	3. lots of pervertedness

Rule15: Jade is to stay far away from Mojo.

*if I find out Sam's dog has been humping Jade senseless they BOTH will lose their penises. I'm not kidding either.*

Rule16: all femmes should ban together to have an all girl party full of feeling each other up.

* all the guys wanted to know what the squealing was. When we told them they "decided" to "guard" us. Pretty sure they were masturbating.*

Rule17:we all know wheelie humps Mikaela's leg like a stuffed animal but why must he walk in like nothings different and climb on?!

*even when she's walking he hitches a ride and starts humping! And she keeps going like nothings different!*

That is all I could think of at the moment.


	4. Chapter 4

I'm sorry to inform anyone who has favorite or followed this story but I have lost any and all inspiration for this story. But I promise that anyone who reviews any of my newest stories with kind words I will get something out as soon as a window is open. Thank you and have a nice day/night.


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